I'm done with Chupa Chups

You hear me, you tasty Spanish bastards? It was bad enough I ate a Chupa Chup lolly that had been lingering in a dingy men's room for God knows how long, and things certainly didn't improve when I found out you have vague overtones of pedophilia on your website. But I can no longer, in good conscience, buy your products. The reason? Well, it has become clear to me that it is no longer just "vague overtones" of kiddy-loving that tinge your site; indeed, it is now apparent that you are a bad case of pedophilia permeates your entire corporate structure.

Last night I wanted to show a few people how suggestive the Chupa Chups website is, and in doing so decided to click through the picture of the young girl with the words "Sucking is good for you! Find out why!" next to her face. Her picture came up again, only this time with the words, "It's natural!" next to her. Creepy.

But click on her face again and see what happens...go on...read that block of text, and tell me if that isn't completely foul in the context of a young girl there. Here are some highlights for my lazy friends who won't click through in another window:

It is the absorption of these nutrients through the walls of the mouth (oral mucus?) that contribute to a quick feeling of fullness...In both cases, sucking is a natural, normal and healthy reflex and it is in fact necessary behaviour for very young children and babies.

Riiiigghhhhtttt....